Stepparent Adoption

My ex-husband and I divorced shortly after our son was born. He did not show for Court, so the judge stated he had no visitation rights until he completed a Parenting Course and Petitioned the Court. To this date, he still has not complied, I have also never received any child support. My son is 6 years old now and my ex-husband,his biological father, has not spoken to or seen him since before he was two years old. My current husband and I started dating soon after that and now we are married. We were trying to do this adoption for the last year or two, but we have run into red tape everywhere because we are unable to find my ex-husband. Is there any way we can proceed with the adoption process even though we can't find my ex?